Saturday, November 21, 2015

An expected turn in your life ...

The prompt yesterday was "An unexpected turn in your life." I didn't like that cancer was immediately where my head went. I'm tired of thinking in terms of "before cancer" and "after cancer", but it is what it is.

I had cancer.

I don't have it right now, but it coming back will always be a worry in the back of my mind. As will worrying about my kids, my husband, my family, my friends....

I hated it when people would tell me cancer happens for a reason, that I'd learn something from the experience. I recognized that it was an attempt to put a positive spin on the situation, it was someone trying to commiserate with me and lift my spirits. But it's a pretty crappy way to learn a lesson and I'd been a mostly good person up to that point, hadn't I? I'd gone to college, I'd never been arrested (still haven't been, btw), I was working, married, paying taxes, raising two kids and a dog. I never expected to get cancer.

But then who does?

In the grand scheme of things, my life has been easy. Cancer has really been the only unexpected thing that has happened, and in comparison to other events in our world, it was a blip in an otherwise charmed existence. So maybe there was a lesson to be learned.

Stuart Scott said, "You beat cancer by how you live, why you live and in the manner in which you live."

With this second chance, the second half of my life, I want to be better. A better wife, a better mom, a better friend ... more patient and compassionate. More understanding. I've realized that everyone ... every single person, young and old ... is battling something. And it's probably something I can't see just by looking, so I try to be more kind and a whole lot less judgemental.

I may not make a huge difference in the world, but maybe I can make a huge difference in one person's day. That would be pretty cool.


  1. To those who say “everything happens for a reason”, I say yeah and that reason is pure random chance.

    I don’t buy that you – or my wife – needed to learn a lesson. You were both beautiful people before and you’re both beautiful people now. Sometimes things just happen.

    Now if going through that made you step back, look at the big picture, and make minor adjustments to your life that is probably a good thing and making the most of the hand you were dealt. A few times a year something will happen that makes me step back and re-evaulate. I almost always make adjustments. None of us are perfect and we can always tweak a few things to become better. I plan on continuing to doing that for the rest of my life.

    Keep on keepin’ on Karen. You’re aces in my book.

    1. Thanks J! Good to hear from you and see that you, your wife and family are doing well. Enjoy the Holidays and Merry Christmas!


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